I don’t want anyone to be alarmed, but I think Gary might be a robot, and the fact that I’m the one noticing that is quite, quite odd.
I only came to this realm a few months ago, and my entire experience with robots has been a viewing of Germinator and Germinator: Rent Assist. And apparently, the latter of these isn’t even the direct sequel; there are two movies in between! Also, moving pictures exist.
You see what I mean. Maybe because I’m secretly a wizard, I have more of an idea of other people’s secrets, and so I can see that Gary is a robot.
People were talking in the break room the other day about reliable mechanics. Brighton seemed to be the location of choice, for reasons I don’t fully understand, but perhaps it is a wellspring of great skill and talent. Must be it. Gary walked into the room, sipping as always from his coffee flask that never seems to run dry and making little piston sounds with his legs, which I assume is normal for some people because no one here seems to notice it.
Someone asked Gary where he gets his cars serviced. He froze for a moment, little computer beeps and boops coming from his skull, before saying “I’m sorry, that’s not within my range of responses.” Then he rotated on the spot (literally) and piston-walked out of the room, sipping from his flask every second step.
I asked people if they thought that Gary was a bit strange, and the general response was ‘yeah, I guess’. He’s a decent office manager, lays down the law without being too harsh. The thing I find especially strange is that he drives to work every day in a nice black car, so you’d think if he got car servicing, he’d be able to say. Maybe he has secret mechanics, the best mechanics, so only he may use their services. Car repair specialists in Brighton who only service shiny black cars, and they do an incredible job.
I’m really just learning about this new, non-magical realm, so maybe that’s pretty standard? Gary is still very much not human, however.