I’ve given it a lot of thought, and I’m fairly sure that the future belongs to robot monkeys. It’s a bit of a shame, but you can’t say we didn’t have a good run. Many thousands of years of true civilisation, although it would’ve been nice if people a few thousand years ago were a …
When I was a kid, I had a forty minute bus ride to school, and I would play this game to pass the time. As we drove through the coastal suburbia, we would pass a wide variety of houses ranging from extravagant 6-bedroom weekenders to modest fibro bungalows (in both tidy and messy variations) to …
This realm and it’s strange technological magic! They have the gall to say that their inventions are non-magical, but then expect me to believe that I am able to view a bewitched moving picture on my electrical portable telephonic device, and this is accomplished via alchemic arithmetic lines drawn inside (‘circuitry’) and a vast behemoth …
Sometimes, on very rare occasions, I grow terribly bored of being rich. For about a minute. Then I remember that I’m rich, and thus the problem of being bored with my vast wealth is just something else I can remove with money. Undercover Boss! It’s that delightfully droll television program on in the middle of …
I just looked at a list of all the films coming out in 2019, and…well, it doesn’t look like I’m going to the cinema for a while. I might possibly be tempted back by Melted 2, because the trailers looked totally amazing, but I really don’t know how much they can do with a movie …
You know the truly great thing about a performance piece? You don’t actually need a reason for it. At all. People will insert their own meaning, so as long as it’s entertaining to watch, you just feel free to go nuts. One girl from my former dance troupe climbed on top of Flinders Street Station …
With every passing year, my parents attain a new level of quirkiness in their gardening methods. It all started when they retired at the same time, whereupon they both took up this pursuit with gusto. That was five years ago and they haven’t looked back, taking every opportunity to try out the latest innovations in …
As a grandma, it’s important to me to keep my home warmly welcoming for the kiddos. I’m their favourite, you know, and I plan on keeping it that way – even if it means sneaking them those little packets of chips I’m not supposed to give them anymore. They’re such small packets; surely giving them …
I can’t believe that NO ONE ever thought of this. That’s crazy. You guys are crazy. The Expo takes place in the summer, so it makes perfect sense for there to be an outdoor event. Golf is outdoors. Come on! I think we need to make this a regular thing for the whole time the …
Continuing what I was talking about before, I still have issues with this car thing. I, as a spooky skeleton, cannot be expected to learn about cars. I don’t even have proper eyes! The sockets do just fine. I mean…I can see stuff, obviously, but no one conducting a driving test would ever think that …